What keeps you away from being a good listener?
“Are you a good listener?” If you are, it is not only an accidental characteristic that makes people around you happier. It is essential for business as well. White-collar workers spend 30-50% of their time listening to others. Well, sometimes they spend that time pretending to listen…
If you are a good listener, you find out about opportunities sooner, you find it easier to convince, influence and motivate people and it is even easier to sell. After all, you know what people’s hopes and worries are. And that is all you know to motivate them, lead them or sell to them.
but what keeps you away from being a good listener? Here are three common challenges:
LISTENING VS CONVINCING
Too many professionals are focused on what they want to say rather than what they want to achieve. You have met them, and you have even been them! A telephone salesperson who doesn’t ask questions, just reads her script. A business presenter who doesn’t interact with the audience. A boss who lectures employees and calls it “feedback”. These habits all make you a bad listener, often without noticing it.
LISTENING VS DISAGREEING Nobody likes to hear things they do not agree with. You don’t either, even if you are a very broad-minded person open to the world. When you hear something with, you experience it as mild stress, and the natural reaction is to ‘fight back’. You start convincing the other side, point out weaknesses in your argument or even become a bit offensive. In fact, when you hear opinions that are different from yours are the best times to start listening.
LISTENING VS RECORDING
Okay, so you decide to be a good listener, and make notes at meeting or during phone calls. You start writing, then you miss a few sentences. Then you start listening carefully, but then how will you remember? So you start writing again, and miss a few more sentences. And so forth, ad infinitum. Making elaborate notes interferes with listening rather then helping it. Of course you can make notes, you just have to know how.
If you want to find out more about how you can improve your listening skills, join us for a 3-hour learning event entitled “Listening Skills for HR Professionals” on 21 May in Shanghai. The details:
Time: 21 May, 2-5 pm
Place: Crowne Plaza Shanghai, 400 Panyu Road
Charge: RMB 200
To make this a more conducive discussion, we are expecting a small group of about 20 people only. Please e-mail your registrations to participate@sh-cbc.com.